Fast sex is like fast food; it might feel great for a few minutes as
your having it, and it might be OK to have it once in a while, but too
much of it is simply
bad.
“Quickies,” as they are often referred to, certainly have their place
in a couple’s sex life, but they should not become substitutes for the
intimate, passionate, and
lengthy experience of sexual intercourse that you have the potential to give to your partner.
There are three main problems that contribute to having fast
sex way too often: trouble controlling your stamina in the bedroom,
laziness, and selfishness. The last two reflect the most poorly on you, and they can
also be
an indication that you don’t like or love your partner as much as you
might have thought you did. The former is the most forgivable for sure,
but it should be treated like both of the others in that you should
constantly work to try and overcome it, as long as you wish to remain in
your current relationship.
Learning how avoid consistently having fast sex by building up your
stamina in bed is difficult, but certainly possible. It can be achieved
by a combination of controlling your mind (sometimes you can become
too into it
too
quickly and, while it may feel amazing, you can be unable to stop
yourself from finishing early) and manipulating the positions you have
sex in; certain positions simply feel better than others – one reason is
that different ones stimulate your penis more or less directly and
intensely – and finding the ones which feel slightly less intense and
sticking to them early on can be a great way to prolong finishing. It
might take time, and it is important to try and be patient with
yourself, work at it, and eventually build your stamina up to the point
at which you give yourself enough time to
satisfy her.
The second problem that leads to consistently fast sex is
laziness.
Sometimes, the idea of having sex with a girl is simply better, and more romantic, than actually doing it.
You might be tired or not really in the mood after a while, and you might not
feel
like putting in the effort it might take to have an intense, lengthy
sexual experience. In this case you might simply decide to cum as fast
as possible. This is certainly something to avoid doing regularly, as it
can eventually make her feel undesired, unappreciated, and somewhat
used, and can certainly degrade the quality of your relationship with
her.
Finally, another issue – somewhat related to the previous one – that can lead to regular “quickies” is
selfishness. Let’s be honest, it is
her that benefits from having sex for a really long time, not you. For you, short and sweet might be all you want or need.
However,
similar to potential laziness in the bedroom, this sort of selfishness
can certainly make her unhappy with the quality of her sex life – and of
course, with you as a boyfriend or husband – over time, and can have a
damaging effect on your relationship.
If you do find yourself constantly wanting to get it over with once
you have started intercourse, it is a good idea to ask yourself
why. If you are constantly
tired,
you can simply talk to her about it, apologize, and try to work harder
at putting more effort into it. If, however, you are not as attracted to
her anymore, and/or don’t really
care about
making her happy, you should seriously think about why you are in this relationship at all – and of course, consider getting out of it.
